I need to force myself to write

How is that everything has got so messed up?! One day you're happy joking with your friends, in love, living your dream and the other day you just lose it all...
I've so much anger inside me, I'm so angry with everyone else, angry at the point that I can't talk...
I feel like I've done everything to have my life exactly as I have planned and that someone just came and took it away from me... 
And the worst is that I've to pretend all day that everything is right, as if being away from the city that I've chosen to live, the friends that become part of my family, the university that gave me so much and of course, him, was nothing, as if it was easy....
I just want to this to pass, I want to forget about him, I want to be well...